Got up late after our late night out last night at mandak. After breakfast, we caught Kaspy on the way back to hostel. It added a bunch of new info that our PMT prof has already put up the study material in web for this Weekend. After going through the material I wondered how he had managed to teach all that in just three hours. And assignments..?? Hey c'mon it's just been a week since college started. Ok I've got some more on the subject of stress and strain. It will be done soon, it's taking up head space so I need to pack it up, digest and free my mind from it as soon as possible. Coz I want atleast one day in a week to spend some time with the God and my people.
Friday, August 3, 2007
Busy Weekend Ahead..
Got up late after our late night out last night at mandak. After breakfast, we caught Kaspy on the way back to hostel. It added a bunch of new info that our PMT prof has already put up the study material in web for this Weekend. After going through the material I wondered how he had managed to teach all that in just three hours. And assignments..?? Hey c'mon it's just been a week since college started. Ok I've got some more on the subject of stress and strain. It will be done soon, it's taking up head space so I need to pack it up, digest and free my mind from it as soon as possible. Coz I want atleast one day in a week to spend some time with the God and my people.
Do we really need someone to care for..?
Yesterday was an extremely busy day. We had so many activities that I even found no time to dream. Immediately after the lecture we went to the library. After that around 11:30 p.m. I had a surprisingly but a sweet conversation with my friend and that took me completely.. I think and truly believe that everybody needs someone, sometime.. No matter how independent I might seem, even I need that special someone sometime, and I’m sure everyone has the same thing… we need to be with someone, and maybe that’s how we are all programme.. No Wonder.. No Surprise on that.. After reaching hostel I thought of spending some time on comp and there I slip again. . The last time I had my eyes off the screen was when the clock showed 3:30 a.m. I tried to sleep but couldn't. I don't know what was happening to me.. Though I was trying to turn myself off there were many programs still running.. I couldn't terminate them.. I could feel the flow of heat inside my head.. May be this is all because I have been thinking too much these days without proper sleep.. I was sensing disappointments for myself once again.. It was not as usual acads i was thinking of but something more than that.. Finally I felt the need to make things efficient.. So just walked out of my room, drank a glass of water and sitting on the grass outside my hostel started staring at the clouds... I just wished when the sun would rise up and the day gonna start..
Thursday, August 2, 2007
I want You to want Me..
I want you to want me.
I need you to need me.
Id love you to love me.
Im beggin you to beg me.
I want you to want me.
I need you to need me.
Id love you to love me.
Ill shine up the old brown shoes, put on a brand-new shirt.
Ill get home early from work if you say that you love me.
Didnt i, didnt i, didnt I see you cryin?
Oh, didnt i, didnt i, didnt I see you cryin?
Feelin all alone without a friend, you know you feel like dyin.
Oh, didnt i, didnt i, didnt I see you cryin?
I want you to want me.
I need you to need me.
Id love you to love me.
Im beggin you to beg me.
Ill shine up the old brown shoes, put on a brand-new shirt.
Ill get home early from work if you say that you love me.
Didnt i, didnt i, didnt I see you cryin?
Oh, didnt i, didnt i, didnt I see you cryin?
Feelin all alone without a friend, you know you feel like dyin.
Oh, didnt i, didnt i, didnt I see you cryin?
Feelin all alone without a friend, you know you feel like dyin.
Oh, didnt i, didnt i, didnt I see you cryin?
I want you to want me.
I need you to need me.
Id love you to love me.
Im beggin you to beg me.
I want you to want me.
I want you to want me.
I want you to want me.
I want you to want me.
Sunday, July 22, 2007
letter to my heart.
Dear heart,
What exactly is wrong with you these days? An issue is solved, now you are fighting your own war again over another. It doesn’t make me feel good that you are behaving this way. You are now beyond my control. I could feel your disappointment, your distress and something else which I really couldn’t comprehend. I’m sorry what you’ve been going through. I know it’s my mistake. Even I’m amazed of how quickly I was able to transit myself to where I’m standing now. Nothing I could have ever imagined. I had no idea what happened to me. I’ve lost track of my emotions and it feels too unreal. However, I have to constantly remind myself to face reality. Reality that I know will torment us, leaving clouds in this head, not knowing what to do for this position is all too new to me. It’s a learning process thus getting hurt is unavoidable. You have to agree with me that fate sometimes do step in at the wrong time. I know it’s hard to give up things that you really love to do. But in a situation like this where we have no choice left, we have to make a sacrifice and it’s the right time to prove this world what we are capable of. So keep hanging on, I know you are strong enough to cross the hurdle. We’ll go through it together. Just don’t break on me.
Love always,
Aman
What exactly is wrong with you these days? An issue is solved, now you are fighting your own war again over another. It doesn’t make me feel good that you are behaving this way. You are now beyond my control. I could feel your disappointment, your distress and something else which I really couldn’t comprehend. I’m sorry what you’ve been going through. I know it’s my mistake. Even I’m amazed of how quickly I was able to transit myself to where I’m standing now. Nothing I could have ever imagined. I had no idea what happened to me. I’ve lost track of my emotions and it feels too unreal. However, I have to constantly remind myself to face reality. Reality that I know will torment us, leaving clouds in this head, not knowing what to do for this position is all too new to me. It’s a learning process thus getting hurt is unavoidable. You have to agree with me that fate sometimes do step in at the wrong time. I know it’s hard to give up things that you really love to do. But in a situation like this where we have no choice left, we have to make a sacrifice and it’s the right time to prove this world what we are capable of. So keep hanging on, I know you are strong enough to cross the hurdle. We’ll go through it together. Just don’t break on me.
Love always,
Aman
Thursday, July 12, 2007
Monday, June 25, 2007
Bang! Bang!
How did I missed this one. After reading my friends blogs namely “Bang” and “Bang ! again”, I couldn’t stop myself from writing this one. I don’t have to say that you have to read “Bang” and “Bang! again” before preceeding with this coz its totally different, but still you can always check them out. You’ll find much more than a bang in this. So get ready for this one. Here it goes..
22-06-2007
As usual I got up listening to my mom wiggings. No surprise it happens everyday and I got accustomed to it. So what I have planed for today? Lemme see.. Hmm.. I remembered that I have to visit railway station and book tickets for my journey along with two other chaps. But it’s already 10:00 am and I remember I had given them a word that I’ll be waiting for them at sharp 10 o’clock near the booking counter. “My God they gonna kill me for this”, I uttered and rushed to the wash basin. In 5 minutes I was ready and about to leave. My mom was puzzled. Where are you going , she asked. “Going to chennai ma Sham tak wapas aajaunga”, I screamed. I don’t know what sense it makes but she unedrstood that I wont be troubling her till evening. It was 10:20 am and I m standing at the Bus stop, luckily the sky was clear and there was no signs of rain. After waiting for 10 long minutes I got a bus and reached station at 11:00 am . I was planning what excuse I should make before them. But what a surprise both the idiot’s havent turned up yet. So now its my turn to blast them off. Finally they arrive at 11:10 am. They looked puzzled and afraid after seeing the big evil grin on my face. But I left them for this time. So after booking our tickets I went to one of the chaps house and had my lunch there. Then we planned for a movie and after the movie… oooooohhh now I think I m making it too long . You people must be really waiting for some action right. So here it goes. It was 06:00 pm in the evening I was on my way back to home. I boadred bus no. 38D from RTC complex. I couldn’t get a seat and was standing. After few stops the bus was fully packed and I was mobbed by the croud. I was thinking it would have been better if I would have waited for few more minutes and boarded some other bus. Suddenly I felt something slipping away from my pocket and Yes it was my wallet. I turned back quicky and saw a guy moving away with it. Hey! I screamed out, throwing my hand onto his face and bang !. I shouted again, “ catch him”. Then in a hurry to escape he dropped my wallet. But he was not so lucky a sardar uncle sitting next to the door seat caught him and here I go again Bang! on to his face. And I knew this one was going to make him go down. Then a slap from sardar’s hand straight onto his face and he’s down on knees. Finally sardar caught hold of his collar and shouted, “stop the bus.”. The bus came to halt and he dragged him out of the bus and again he goes one more slap.. “Don’t leave him”, “ Aise logon ko to..”, “ police yame chestadi kottandi salae gadini..” people screamed. The scoundrel started crying and falls onto sardar legs. But the infuriated sardar kicks him and the junta arround also starts beating him up. In the mean while I collect my wallet. After some time someone from the croud says “ Stop beating him, he had enough for today” . “ Ya leave him now, its enough ” , I said after seeing the scoundrel bleeding from his nose. Finally the scoundrel turned back and went his way. Every one got back into the bus and the bus started. I thanked the Sardar for his help and others. One stop before mine, the sardar got down after that my stop arrived and I was down . Firstly I felt good and heroic for what myself and others have done, but later I felt pity on that man. But in the end that’s what he deserved, I thought. I mean at least now he’ll think twice before doing something wrong. And sardar ji se panga kabhi nahi. tauba tauba.. Talking about human reflexes I say they are always unpredictable. I mean I have never beaten some person like that before. But had an experience of a punch in school drama. Belive me it hurt lot more than you think. And I’m not joking..
22-06-2007
As usual I got up listening to my mom wiggings. No surprise it happens everyday and I got accustomed to it. So what I have planed for today? Lemme see.. Hmm.. I remembered that I have to visit railway station and book tickets for my journey along with two other chaps. But it’s already 10:00 am and I remember I had given them a word that I’ll be waiting for them at sharp 10 o’clock near the booking counter. “My God they gonna kill me for this”, I uttered and rushed to the wash basin. In 5 minutes I was ready and about to leave. My mom was puzzled. Where are you going , she asked. “Going to chennai ma Sham tak wapas aajaunga”, I screamed. I don’t know what sense it makes but she unedrstood that I wont be troubling her till evening. It was 10:20 am and I m standing at the Bus stop, luckily the sky was clear and there was no signs of rain. After waiting for 10 long minutes I got a bus and reached station at 11:00 am . I was planning what excuse I should make before them. But what a surprise both the idiot’s havent turned up yet. So now its my turn to blast them off. Finally they arrive at 11:10 am. They looked puzzled and afraid after seeing the big evil grin on my face. But I left them for this time. So after booking our tickets I went to one of the chaps house and had my lunch there. Then we planned for a movie and after the movie… oooooohhh now I think I m making it too long . You people must be really waiting for some action right. So here it goes. It was 06:00 pm in the evening I was on my way back to home. I boadred bus no. 38D from RTC complex. I couldn’t get a seat and was standing. After few stops the bus was fully packed and I was mobbed by the croud. I was thinking it would have been better if I would have waited for few more minutes and boarded some other bus. Suddenly I felt something slipping away from my pocket and Yes it was my wallet. I turned back quicky and saw a guy moving away with it. Hey! I screamed out, throwing my hand onto his face and bang !. I shouted again, “ catch him”. Then in a hurry to escape he dropped my wallet. But he was not so lucky a sardar uncle sitting next to the door seat caught him and here I go again Bang! on to his face. And I knew this one was going to make him go down. Then a slap from sardar’s hand straight onto his face and he’s down on knees. Finally sardar caught hold of his collar and shouted, “stop the bus.”. The bus came to halt and he dragged him out of the bus and again he goes one more slap.. “Don’t leave him”, “ Aise logon ko to..”, “ police yame chestadi kottandi salae gadini..” people screamed. The scoundrel started crying and falls onto sardar legs. But the infuriated sardar kicks him and the junta arround also starts beating him up. In the mean while I collect my wallet. After some time someone from the croud says “ Stop beating him, he had enough for today” . “ Ya leave him now, its enough ” , I said after seeing the scoundrel bleeding from his nose. Finally the scoundrel turned back and went his way. Every one got back into the bus and the bus started. I thanked the Sardar for his help and others. One stop before mine, the sardar got down after that my stop arrived and I was down . Firstly I felt good and heroic for what myself and others have done, but later I felt pity on that man. But in the end that’s what he deserved, I thought. I mean at least now he’ll think twice before doing something wrong. And sardar ji se panga kabhi nahi. tauba tauba.. Talking about human reflexes I say they are always unpredictable. I mean I have never beaten some person like that before. But had an experience of a punch in school drama. Belive me it hurt lot more than you think. And I’m not joking..
Saturday, June 23, 2007
As time pass by..
When I was very young, I expressed myself perfectly and I was a success machine. If I wanted a toy or something, I used to grab it and not leave until my dad pays for it. It was so simple. I used to get whatever I wanted. If I were sad, I cried. If I were angry, I showed it immediately and minutes later I used to forget everything. And now as I grow older, I am told to stop crying, stop playing around, stop getting angry. C'mon what is it..? Does it sounds euphoric to you? Not to me,It just sounds like a recipe for disaster. Gradually what all we do is hide our emotions and the anger gets bottled up, sadness builds, and our childlike playfulness dwindles away.. So how do I live this life..?? Now when I get angry I often break objects and feel bad about it later or I punch the wall so hard that I end up hurting myself. What can we do now to combat this situation.? We can do nothing..! The time has gone.. Belive it or not nobody can bring back such glorious days. I remember a time when I used to hugg everyone, when I laughed atleast once every day until I cried, when I used to climb trees and looked up at the clouds, When everything looked new to these eyes, when I loved people unconditionally.. And now everything has changed.. My behaviour towards others, my skills, my hobbies, my interests n everything.. My own happiness is the one thing that always comes to my mind when i think about whats important to me in this world. I know there are many other things like money,food,love, sucess but still if you are unhappy whats the use of having all these stufff..? I still don't know why I m scribbling all these things or what I actually want to convey through this. But We have to start searching for all those feelings because life has so much to offer and we don't wanna loose anything..
ciao..
ciao..
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